Boys? Or me?

Last week was really a week for the record books of boys... My friend was counting up all the thing Middle P did and laughing, all the while hardly believing he and I both survived. Let me begin.

Monday. Middle P and I are in the basement doing laundry. I come up and tell him he needs to come up too, Now, a few minutes later he finally arrives. A little while later I go back to my basement to find water flowing all over my floor! I look to see that the pipes between the washer and the drain basin have disconnected! Yep, somehow my 3 year old managed to dislodge 2 pipes (we think he stood on it to look into the basin). But back to the water, yep my washing machine was in the middle of dumping the 2nd tub full of water all over my basement! Yeah, what more can a mom ask for but a basement full of dirty laundry, a pipe pouring water everywhere and now a basement full of WET dirty laundry. We won't go into details about how I got the mess cleaned, how I explained all this to Mr. P and the lack of punishment Middle P received. Let me just give you the high points, Mr. P was highly impressed that I managed to tackle the catastrophe on my own, I managed to get the laundry accomplished for once and we now have a clean basement!

Wednesday. I come up from the basement, from doing laundry, what else? to find that Middle P and Baby P have not only dumped a whole box of dry spaghetti on the floor but they have proceeded to dance and jump and crush it all over the kitchen floor. Again, we won't go into details about how I got it cleaned up, let's just say the vacuum was very clogged. (maybe next time I'll try the broom).

Friday. I discover ex-lax on the floor of my bathroom, still a good amount left, but hard to tell if any was eaten. I ask Middle P about it, he claims he did NOT eat any. I ask again, and again, and still again later. No he did not eat any. Later that night my husband changes his diaper, after, I ask if it was diarrhea, and he says yes. I ask if it was bad and if there was a lot and he says yes. I proceed to tell him the story and all he says is "great". Later that night sometime while he was sleeping, Middle P has another bout, only no one knows this, until Mr. P changes him in the morning to find, huge blisters everywhere, where after getting a new diaper cries for an hour because of the pain. This is when Middle P finally fesses up, he ate mommy and daddy's chocolate. We spend a great deal of time explaining why we don't eat these things, why we don't get into the medicine cabinet, why we don't play in the bathroom, etc, etc, etc. I don't think he heard any of it, because he was in such excruciating pain. (Oh and please don't ask if we told him that this wouldn't have happened if he knew how to use the potty, because the answer is yes, about 100 times!).

I change him later to find that the blisters are huge and full of liquid. I decide to call the nurse, first she calls poison control, yeah mommy of the year award for me, please! But just so you know there is not toxic level of ex-lax, although I'm not sure I believe that. Anyway, bottom line he needs to be seen. It takes Mr. P and I both to take him, we knew it would be a 2 parent chore. We go to the Dr. and wait for about 2 hours to be seen, this was after we let Middle P ride in the floor board of the car because it hurt too bad to sit in the car seat (don't tell anyone and yes I know you all are gasping in horror because I am an car seat freak, don't judge). So we finally are seen, and the with the glimpse of his butt that the Dr. got, because Middle P was thrashing so much, we get the diagnosis of... Chemical Burn.

Yep, my 3 yr old has a CHEMICAL BURN on his butt!! Apparently the stomach acid and bile in your stomach is toxic enough to cause a chemical burn, who knew? Wow. So we are given an ointment for his butt that is given to severe burn victims, yep mother of the year award, I know. This ointment is really cool though, at least I thought so, it is an antibiotic, a pain reliever AND it eats away at the dead skin so that bacteria can't live on it, cool, I know! We are making major progress in the butt department. Not so much pain, healing nicely.

Oh and yesterday I took Baby P in for gunky eyes and he has pink eye, and so does much of Princess P's class, because she had it about a week or two ago! Yep, I know, you can just Fed Ex that mother of the year award right on over, I know I deserve it!!